Swipe Right, our new advice column, tackles the tricky world of online dating. This week: how to get more replies
I’ve been trying online dating for a year or so now. I sent my first message nervously, wondering what reply might come back, and was slightly surprised and disappointed when nothing happened. Now, after messaging 87 different ladies, none of whom have replied either.
I’m entirely stuck. I’m no scattergun, I carefully read every profile before choosing which people to message, then send them a message responding to the information they’ve provided and asking them questions to find out more.
I’ve had friends review my profile and they’re at a loss as to why I’m not getting replies. I did have a short relationship with one person who messaged me first, and she commented that my profile didn’t sound like I actually am, but I’ve no idea how.
My goal is now a nihilistic one: I want to get to 100 people messaged with no reply before quitting for good. Can you help me get a happier ending?
First of all: give yourself a break. Hide your profiles, or delete them, for at least a month. Maybe two! Not because you’re never going to meet anyone online, but because you’re focused on counting rejections. This is not the right frame of mind to meet anyone. Would you go to the movies if going to the movies made you feel miserable?
Take a breather and focus on other ways that you enjoy spending your time. The love of your life is not going to slip through your fingers because you weren’t looking for her online for a couple of months, I promise.Continue reading